As the rain began to trickle, I was confronted by an inescapable truth, this was our last goodbye.  No amount of denial, or begging, or promising things I knew I could never follow through on would ever change this fact.  My dad was gone, he would never wrap me in the comfort of his arms again, he would never be there to tell me how proud he is, and there would be no one to tell me about mom.

It was just me and David now, or whatever part of David that was still salvageable.  The worst part was knowing that, had I tried harder to keep him home, this would have never happened, none of it.

“Damn it!” I yelled.  Angry with myself, with the Corps, with the way life never plays fair.  But mostly, I wanted revenge on Death for taking what’s mine.

I dropped to my knees, folded over in the fetal position, caving to the tears I worked so hard to contain.  He’s gone, and David had to watch.  All I had left was the pain-the dull constant ache where there was once a purposeful, steady rhythm.  I can’t do this.

I sobbed hopelessly, rain trickling over my face.  “I can’t do this.”

An electrical charge surged through my body as the familiar warmth of his hand embraced my neck and shoulder.  I didn’t need to look to know it was Alex.

“It’s time to go,” he said, his voice a musical whisper.  He knelt next to me and I closed my eyes, resting my cheek against his hand.  I already missed the sweet, seductive scent that always seemed to radiate from his skin.  I couldn’t make myself move.  I wasn’t ready to leave my dad.  I sat still for a moment, staring at the hollow earth between us patiently waiting to be filled.

“I’ve got her, son,”  I heard Tanq say.  He was kind towards Alex, and I was glad.  I noticed David glaring coldly at him when we arrived at the chapel.  He also refused to shake his hand as everyone passed to offer their condolences.

Tanq scooped me effortlessly into his arms, cradling me like a child.  I held onto his neck as he and David walked to the awaiting caravan.  I cleared the tears from my eyes watching Alex through the thin haze veiling the window.  There he stood, still as stone staring back at me.  I took one last look, memorizing every exquisite detail of the mystifying boy that I would never again see.

Just as we began to pull away, a hand print appeared in the window fog.  I placed my hand in its perfect outline, absorbing the heat that lingered where Alex touched.  It seemed trivial now, wondering what magic lay beyond his perfect face.

Comments
  1. dollyperry says:

    I really like this entry-lots of emotion. Tackling the concept and realization of death for a character is a hard one to do.
    I think the reason it stands out is because it’s much more interesting and informative than the depressed and apathetic sadness/shock she had before. (Totally understandable, and a good way to show time has passed.) You really get to see how deeply they’re hurt when they express emotions.

  2. pharrahkelley says:

    i cant wait for the rest of the book to come out

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